Cottage by the River

Dear Bloggie,

I got the feeling that me and xiang, will not be able to pull it tru this time round.

Why does God have to be so cruel to me, putting me tru the same agony two times in a row?

I'm really not sure if I can be able to take the blow again this time round. And now, he already think we cant continue on, and yet he ask me to wait for half a year more, wait for his next semester to start, to confirm that we really cant carry on.

I told him not to make me wait like this, telling me its not possible and still asked me to wait.

Why cant the person I love just simply be with me?

After going tru so much with him, I am indeed a very changed person.

Changed to the better I think. But yet, why does this have to happen again?

What did I do wrong. Why does a bloody degree in NUS have to come in between the both of us... Why am I so much less important then his degree.

I really dont know why.

Can someone just enlighten me?

I just love him, simple love a man and wants to be with him. What is so difficult about it.. Why do things have to always turn out like this for me...

I'm scare... very very scare.