Cottage by the River

Dear Bloggie,

I have tendered my resignation on the 5th March.

Its rejected by my boss, he have asked me to go think about it and hope that I'll stay on. He promised that give him 1 year, just 1 more year to let the company go through some changes. So I told him I'll think about it. But well, I have thought about it, and have decided to reject his kind offer.

Anyway, I spoke to my HR Manager earlier on. My 5th March resignation still stands.

So my last day is on 4th April. [Edited]

Nope, I have not found a job yet.

Did I tell you that I gave him a chance after I realised he has cheated on me?

Yup, I burried everything behind me (well, almost everything) and still hold on to his hand, hoping that this time round, we are truly walking towards paradise. I thought what wouldnt break us, will only make us stronger...

BUT (yes, sad to say... there is a BUT) he failed me once more...

I felt so cheated again once more...

And strangly, I felt dumped. Even thou I'm not in the wrong...

Even thou the breakup is meant to be for my good (well, maybe it is if he kept cheating me), but I really love him...

Okie, I think... In my opinion.

He gave up this relationship is because he realised that the world is so big, and there are greener pasture outside. And I am definately one big block blocking him away from his "paradise"... Thus the only feasible way is to have me remove.

I have forced myself to pick myself up, and not break into piece like the last time round. I will walk away with dignity, as ultimately, I am NOT in fault... (okie, maybe a little here and there...) But somewhere not very deep down in my heart, I know I love him, and still want him back. Silly I know.. But this is love right?

At a time like this... Where supports are extremely important due to major changes in my life, I finally know who are my true friends.

Some of them are nowhere to be seen. I have to admit I was in denial stage earlier on, so maybe that pushes them a little aways from me. And maybe right now, I should be the one who have to lower my head down and approach them and tell them that I need help.

But, as friends... I dont think I need to do till that extreme to like beg for friends to come over shower me with the care and concern right...

Luckily, I still have a couple who have stood by me even when I'm denial, and is still on stand-by mode for me till now. Think I really have been very good friends to some, thus they have not given me up along the way...)

Anyway, thanks for those who have been with me all these while kae... I am sorry to trouble all of you now as I kept making dinner dates and all coz I really need some distractions and company.

Dont worry, I am not like last time. I am very calm and cool, and I still have that little sense of humor. (not alot, but just that pathetic bit little...)

Leaving him, is definately a catalyst of my leaving my current job.

For once, I have not been wishy-washy and letting things drag...

I want a fresh start, a new beginning.

If you are really my true friend, please just drop me an sms or email and tell me you love me kae...

Oh, and btw... I bought a new dog. A baby shih tzu, and Toffee is his name.